To Grind or not to Grind?

At a basement cocktail bar, inside a dungeon-like cell of a former Victorian police station, whilst sipping some of the finest cocktails in East London, my last guests and I fell into a conversation about suffering and the exhausting hustle for one's dreams. Some argued that the constant grind made them appreciate their wins all the more; others insisted we don't need a side of suffering just to enjoy the main course of life.

One guest even suggested that without the "bad," the "good" would lose its meaning entirely. I wasn't drinking (hosting duty), but while they were well past their third round, the conversation felt more sober than ever. The question is: do we really have to suffer to appreciate the good in life, and is evil really a requirement to identify what’s truly worth it?

As the drinks flowed and the crowd thinned, the debate narrowed down to two: myself and the only other guest left standing, a very attractive American man with Scandinavian roots. He was of the mind that suffering builds resilience and grit; that if something is easy, is it even worth having in the first place?

I believed that we don’t necessarily need the bad to exist to appreciate the good, or to understand what is bad. When something is "off," your body has ways of telling you: a bad odour, or bad behaviour that’s bothersome or painful. The belief was that opposing forces made us appreciate one and depreciate the other even more, but we didn't need to suffer to know what bad is, nor do we need it as a prerequisite for joy.

He ordered one last cocktail, even more scrumptious than the one before, and we finally reached a consensus: the 'bad' might have an enhancing effect, making us appreciate the 'good' more, but we could perfectly well live a life free of the grit and the grind and be blissfully happy. After all, the things we acquire easily can be just as valuable as those we suffer for. Breathing, for most of us, is fairly easy and free—but would you really wish a respiratory illness upon yourself just to appreciate the air in your lungs?

Or, in other words: the 'bad' is like a bad ex—it certainly makes you appreciate the 'good' one when he finally shows up, but you wouldn't exactly volunteer for the heartbreak if you could skip straight to the happy ending.

We toasted to a life of perfect happiness.

So, what do you prefer: unaware bliss, or forever grit and grind?